Mother remembers daughter killed in Dawson College shooting 20 years on

Twenty years after the Dawson College shooting, Louise De Sousa says she still speaks every day to her daughter, Anastasia De Sousa, and asks her to watch over the family. She says the pain of losing her daughter has not disappeared, but she has learned to live alongside it and hold on to her memories.

On Sept. 13, 2006, Anastasia De Sousa, 18, was killed after a gunman opened fire in Dawson College’s cafeteria in Montreal. At least 19 other people were injured before police fatally shot the gunman.

De Sousa was on her lunch break when co-workers who had worked with Anastasia that summer told her about the shooting. After repeated calls to her daughter went unanswered, another co-worker said many victims were being taken to Montreal General Hospital. She went there hoping to find Anastasia, but instead spent hours seeking answers as uncertainty turned to fear.

She described the day as chaotic and said that, after pleading with police for information, the family did not receive confirmation until 9 p.m. She said the confirmation of Anastasia’s death shattered her heart and broke the family’s life apart.

In the years that followed, De Sousa and her husband decided to keep moving forward for their two other children. She remembers Anastasia’s infectious laugh and says she still struggles with the life her daughter never had the chance to live, particularly at family gatherings where she feels Anastasia should be present.

De Sousa now shares Anastasia’s story with students to honour her memory. She hopes young people will support one another and recognize when someone may be struggling. She said the gunman may have faced difficulties but did not receive or seek the help he needed; while she does not accept that as an excuse, she hopes speaking in schools can help young people. Grief, she said, has changed but never left her.